analyze.

Joe and I had a conversation (and have since referred back to it more than once) that absolutely intrigued me.

It all started because he is one of those people who can just fall asleep at the drop of a hat. I, on the other hand, lay down and ponder everything--what was my day like, what's on the agenda for tomorrow, and did I remember to put my Homiletics paper in the folder so that I can turn it in in the morning...and then, if I decide that my answer to #3 is "no", I proceed to check on said paper, confirming that it's in the appropriate place. And then, it's back to the thinking and pondering.

Of course, there are exceptions. Sometimes, I am so exhausted that I just hit the pillow and drift off. Such a thing is rare, however.

Anyway, from this, Joe and I began to talk about how his mind can just be a blank slate. This, of course, is not to say that he's dumb in anyway, but that he can just completely seperate his thoughts from the moment. If you know me at all, you know that this is not true for me. I overanalyze. I connect things that probably make no sense to connect. And, this, I believe, is part of the reason for my exceptional memory.

For me, life is a mnemonic device. I relate everything to everything. I am quite observant, and when I observe something and then relate it to another familiar thing, I am doubly aware of it categorically, and thus able to better recall it. This is why, for example, I was able to sort all of the clean laundry in Israel last summer, making sure that it was in piles for each individual to take back to their room...and all that after only the first week.

This is also why I sometimes have to act like I've never met someone when they introduce themself to me, as there are frequently times when I think to myself, for example:

"Ah, yes...Andy. Went to Miami. Works at MBNA. Likes fishing. 26. Birthday? Late August, because I remember it being around when J's bday is. Let's see....yes, I recall he celebrated 3 days before I went to J's, so around Aug. 16...hmm....lots of August birthdays. Johanna, Joe, Ashley, Brandon, Jen, Emily....I know I haven't seen or spoken with the last three in years, but their birthdays are still in August....I wonder how many other people's birthdays I remember....hm....I'll make a list."

Right. And there you see a tiny window into the randomness that is me.

Joe is coming over tonight, and we're going to cook dinner together and watch a movie. I am really glad that he's going to spend some time with is dad first, and I'm also glad that I know he'll tell me if he wants to talk about that situation or not. Last night, for example, he and I talked about it a couple of times on our own, but when we were at O.D. and out with the gang afterward, he wanted it as far away from his mind as possible. And that was good too.

It's been an amazing week in some ways, a really rough week in others...it seems as if there are so many people around me dealing with personal tragedy and loss right now, and I realized how much it was taking its toll emotionally on me yesterday. Of course, it's not at all about me, and I will continue to be the person I can be when some is in need and thinks I might be of some help. It's not in my nature to be selective about that. But I am just really grateful that there are people in my life, also, who are willing to let me lean on them too.

Take my family, for example. I know I always talk about how great they are, and this is just another on the infinite lists of reasons why...I called Mom yesterday morning, and, by my voice, I was clearly upset. She called back while I was at work and couldn't answer, then called back again a bit later and we talked for 3 seconds (I was still at work), and then she called back again after work and just let me talk and encouraged me and let me be upset and everything. I called Dad, too, and he stepped out of a meeting just to take my call, and then was with Mom when she called the third time, offering occasional background commentary (as Dad so frequently does). And I finally had the chance to call J, and she offered a successful blend of listening as I talked about the rough stuff, and letting me talking about the happy stuff too. And she made me smile. Plus, of course, I got to talk to Rachel, who told me all about her bandaids, her silver slippers from Oma, riding her very first roller coaster (with Buzz Lightyear), and swimming in the pool, among other things.

Yes, my family is fabulous. We're so good at supporting each other when stuff is happening in one of our lives, or when something is happening that directly affects all of us. We just love each other a whole lot, and that is clear to anyone who meets us. In really different ways, I realized again this year that my family is an anomaly...and a gift.

Anyway, I have sufficiently jumped around now...and I have work to do (though I am really tempted to go back to sleep for a little bit).

Bye :0)